there is current debate about moon cycles. i say debate, but it’s really one giraffe who’s gone crazy and is shouting his crazy ideas at everyone. ‘you won’t listen!!’ he’ll say. he’s right. we won’t, because he’s crazy. we call him ‘dr. loopy’, because that’s his name…
if you don’t know what moon cycles are, i will explain. as has been known for ever, at the beginning of each day, three ‘torch-bearers’, bearing what we think must be hot fire torches, burn the moon just before it comes up in the sky, and that is what provides us with heat and light. now, when it comes to the end of the day, the moon goes down for a rest because it’s tired and its heat runs out, so for the night it is cold and dark.
well, dr. loopy says that the hot moon and the cold moon are separate objects and that they just swap over after a certain amount of time. he also says hot fire torch bearers don’t exist. i don’t know where he must have got that idea from. my mum thinks some giraffes are crazy from birth. we recently appointed a sheriff and he says that if dr. loopy comes up with one more crazy idea he’s going to make him stand by the crazy tree.
anyway, the reason i mention moon cycles today is that i keep getting letters. this week i’ve had four, all delivered by a scary pink bird who keeps trying to surprise me. one giraffe said that one time the bird had been standing on my back for at least three hours, and when i finally noticed he screamed ‘LETTER!’ at me, and then he dropped it and flew away as quickly as he could. i remember the last letter, it said ‘you have 23 moon cycles left, enjoy your freedom’, and then it had a picture of an angry centipede on it. i don’t like getting letters.
i talked about my mum earlier, well, she seems to be getting more worried, and she also seems to be getting confused as well. yesterday she gave me a pie which had poison berries in it. i was really poorly. we don’t even have any poison berries in this area. she says she got it from the ‘famous pie selling wildebeest’, i think i knew who she meant, and i’d like to say to him that he’s rude and his pies are rubbish.